Some time ago I had a huge fight with a friend and one thing she said to me and to other people is that the only reason I was trying so hard to fix our friendship was so that I wouldn’t be perceived as a “bad person”. That really hurt me and really got me thinking.
Our issues weren’t about how people perceived me (I couldn’t give a fuck about how people perceived me lol) but than again I do not liked to be misunderstood. So I was trying so hard to get my point across to her, telling her how I felt, how what she said or what she had done had hurt me. I’m known for telling the truth; I may say unpleasant things at time but they are for a good reason and they are the truth as I see it. I was hoping that maybe, she would see that I was just trying to make her understand that I was feeling the same way she was feeling too.
In the end, nobody wants to be perceived as a bad person. I like to believe that people are inherently good and that we can chose the behaviours that affect the perceptions of others. In my case, I wanted her to understand me, does that make me a bad person?
Now I’ve lost a friend I’ve cherished for a long time, she thinks and tells people I’m a bad person. It keeps resonating in my head,sigh, it’s all so hurtful 🙁